As the gap between being a kid and becoming a teenager shrinks every day, I can’t help but catch myself looking at this beautiful girl and thinking how did this happen?
I oftentimes catch myself being surprised at how much I truly love this stage. I’ll be honest—I’ve been dreading teenage years because I’m terrified my pay back for my own rebellion is looming right behind age 15. But for now, I am taking the difficulties in stride, and on a few occasions in tears, and enjoying the connection, and the friendship, that is forming between us.
Just the other day, I had a mom meltdown. To spare you all the details, I was overwhelmed and stressed about something in the future, I took it out on my daughter, and I cringe when I say this—hung up on her, then I left the only grocery store on my way home in tears because ALL I NEEDED WAS HEAVY CREAM AND FROZEN BROCCOLI THAT WASN’T MILKED FROM A UNICORN OR GROWN FROM GOLDEN SEEDS. (Health food stores, that’s a whole other blog).
In good mom fashion I dried my tears, wiped my snot on my sleeve and walked in the house with my head held high, forgetting that my eyes were red and swollen and I’m the worlds worst at pretending everything is fine. The word fine will make my face wrinkle up in ugly cry mode if I’m not fine. So when munchkin saw me she asked what was wrong, and I opened my arms up, wrapped her in a hug, laid my cheek on her head and said
“it’s tough being a girl.”
Ain’t that the truth y’all. It’s tough being a girl at all stages.
When we are first born we have to wear bows in our hair so people don’t mistake us for a boy.
When we are toddlers we don’t get the luxury of running around in just our diaper because *gasp* we have nipples.
When we are preschoolers our attitude and independence starts forming and for some odd reason mom doesn’t love it as much as we do.
When we are elementary age we get our first dose of drama and realize not all girls are nice, and all boys are gross.
When we enter tween years we deal with hormones, ever changing moods, bras, makeup, fashion, body image, and crushes (and all the blushing that comes along with that word).
When we graduate to teen-hood we embark on a journey through a foreign land. A land of more freedom, peer pressure, life changing friendships and relationships, life altering decisions, mean girls, and rollercoaster emotions,
It is during this stage that I whole heartedly believe we need our mothers, even when we push them away. And I am going to call cow pie on the notion that we can’t be our kids friends— COW PIE.
My daughter needs to know she has a friend, a best friend, she can turn to when life is tough. She needs to know she has a friend that will speak truth into her life when the rest of the world is screaming lies. She needs to know she has a friend that will be there for her, that she can call in the middle of the night when she made a wrong choice. She needs to know that she has someone rooting for her, fighting for her, and guiding her on the right path. She needs to know that she has someone that will tell her when she’s wrong, but help her make it right. She needs to know she has a safe place to store her hopes, her dreams, her secrets. She needs to know she has someone to tell her she’s beautiful and remind her of it, if ever she forgets.
She needs to know that when she’s had a rough day she can come wrap her arms around her best friend and know, that she gets it.
I will ALWAYS be that person for my daughter, just like my mother has been for me.
Because it’s tough being a girl, but it’s a whole lot easier when you have your best friend by your side.